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Nov. 14th, 2024 07:58 pmEndured a phone call from dad last night. He doesn't call to talk; he calls to lecture and complain.
"no one talks to me"
"[grandson w/3 littles] was supposed to do xyz and he hasn't called me back"
"this happened and no one told me"
"that's going on and I don't have the full details presented to me immediately"
"did you see [reads off Facebook statuses for relatives I've never met]?"
and so on.
Do I get to speak? Kinda. at some point I interjected that I was leaving Friday after work for NC. He made noises of acknowledgement. not two minutes later I get asked what I'm doing this weekend (after his tirade about his DIL's birthday and recent surgery). deep breath, and firmly stated "I just said I am going to Greensboro" to which he cuts me off with "OK, OK, blustery blatheringly annoying accusations because **he** was "just asking a question" and why do **I** have to get so worked up over it? see also: geez, can't you take a joke? and lighten up, I was just kidding.
all of this was precipitated by his Dr appointment on Tuesday, a follow up to his recent hospital stay to zap his heart to fix the atrial fibrillation. Doc told him "NO MORE ALCOHOL" and if it's not the first time he's been told this, it's the first time he's been willing to HEAR it. But now he wants everything out of the house RIGHT NOW. The unspoken "why haven't you driven up here yet?" hung in the air.
I don't drink. My brother stopped drinking. not sure about his wife, although I fully expect the booze I brought over for Jello Shots to be gone now. that's the other thing -- "well you and SIL did those Jello shots..." as if this is a weekly ritual for us. we did them ONE TIME for a sports fundraiser. I already had all the booze, so it only cost them the Jello and containers to do it. I told dad to check with Nephew and what they want. I also suggested keeping things around for the holidays for stepmom's kids, and wow was that a bad idea. cue rant about her kids and how they do things/prefer things (and probably think dad is too low-class for their taste.
With the information on this weekend's trip finally accepted by his thick skull, dad demanded that I send them a list of all of my upcoming trips. normally I just mumble along, but this was so ridiculous that I laughed out loud and told him NOT GONNA HAPPEN. I have a calendar, not a list. actually, there IS a list, but I am NOT giving him the names of the hotels I'm staying at, venues, etc. He has lost the privilege of getting info in writing. too many privacy violations in the past. Then he launched into the "drive safe" thing and once again i'm in the wrong because he's "just saying" and the mention of getting new tires (factory originals are at 58k miles, and even I can tell they're seconds from being bald) and that initiates the rants about how they should be fine followed by the dangers of driving through the mountains, types of tires, did I get the right ones, and another jab at Nephew, who will be doing the installation.
I just can't even anymore. the intense RAGE I felt when I got off the phone is not something I want. I put these things off as long as I can, but that just makes it worse. I just want this to be OVER.
"no one talks to me"
"[grandson w/3 littles] was supposed to do xyz and he hasn't called me back"
"this happened and no one told me"
"that's going on and I don't have the full details presented to me immediately"
"did you see [reads off Facebook statuses for relatives I've never met]?"
and so on.
Do I get to speak? Kinda. at some point I interjected that I was leaving Friday after work for NC. He made noises of acknowledgement. not two minutes later I get asked what I'm doing this weekend (after his tirade about his DIL's birthday and recent surgery). deep breath, and firmly stated "I just said I am going to Greensboro" to which he cuts me off with "OK, OK, blustery blatheringly annoying accusations because **he** was "just asking a question" and why do **I** have to get so worked up over it? see also: geez, can't you take a joke? and lighten up, I was just kidding.
all of this was precipitated by his Dr appointment on Tuesday, a follow up to his recent hospital stay to zap his heart to fix the atrial fibrillation. Doc told him "NO MORE ALCOHOL" and if it's not the first time he's been told this, it's the first time he's been willing to HEAR it. But now he wants everything out of the house RIGHT NOW. The unspoken "why haven't you driven up here yet?" hung in the air.
I don't drink. My brother stopped drinking. not sure about his wife, although I fully expect the booze I brought over for Jello Shots to be gone now. that's the other thing -- "well you and SIL did those Jello shots..." as if this is a weekly ritual for us. we did them ONE TIME for a sports fundraiser. I already had all the booze, so it only cost them the Jello and containers to do it. I told dad to check with Nephew and what they want. I also suggested keeping things around for the holidays for stepmom's kids, and wow was that a bad idea. cue rant about her kids and how they do things/prefer things (and probably think dad is too low-class for their taste.
With the information on this weekend's trip finally accepted by his thick skull, dad demanded that I send them a list of all of my upcoming trips. normally I just mumble along, but this was so ridiculous that I laughed out loud and told him NOT GONNA HAPPEN. I have a calendar, not a list. actually, there IS a list, but I am NOT giving him the names of the hotels I'm staying at, venues, etc. He has lost the privilege of getting info in writing. too many privacy violations in the past. Then he launched into the "drive safe" thing and once again i'm in the wrong because he's "just saying" and the mention of getting new tires (factory originals are at 58k miles, and even I can tell they're seconds from being bald) and that initiates the rants about how they should be fine followed by the dangers of driving through the mountains, types of tires, did I get the right ones, and another jab at Nephew, who will be doing the installation.
I just can't even anymore. the intense RAGE I felt when I got off the phone is not something I want. I put these things off as long as I can, but that just makes it worse. I just want this to be OVER.
